slightly controversial maybe so dont blame me if the wife/gf sees it lol
Sixteen Logical Reasons Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:
1. The later you are, the more excited your dog is to see you.
2. Dogs don't notice if you call them
by another dog's name.
3. Dogs like it if you leave lots
of things on the floor.
4. Dogs' parents never visit.
5. Dogs agree that you have to
raise your voice to get your point across.
6. You never have to wait for a dog;
they're ready to go, instantly,
24 hours a day.
7. Dogs find you amusing
when you're pissed.
8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
9. Dogs won't wake you up at night to ask: "If I died, would you get another dog?"
10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and sell 'em.
11. Dogs love to ride in the back of
a pickup truck.
12. Dogs never tell you to stop scratching
your balls. Instead, they sit pondering
why you don't lick 'em.
14. Dogs will let you put a studded collar on, without calling you a pervert.
15. If a dog smells another dog on you, it won't kick you in the crotch; it just finds it interesting.
And last, but not least:
16. If a dog runs off and leaves you,
it won't take half your stuff.
To verify these statements:
Lock your wife and your dog in the garage
for an hour. Then open the door, and observe
who's happy to see you!